Monday, January 10, 2011

William says, "You're a doughnut shop, dang it!"

Why on earth would ANYONE go to Dunkin' Donuts for anything other than a doughnut? I know, I know, they're doughnuts aren't very good. They're dried-out, crumbly rings of blandness. But who are they kidding? They're not called Dunkin' Egg-White Omelette Sandwiches. Stick to what your known for, and what you presumably know best. Because after tasting your doughnuts, I sure as heck will stay away from your egg-white omelettes.

William says, "Do these shoes make my butt look big?"

A craze is sweeping the nation. Okay, this "craze" has been around for years, and it shows no sign of stopping. In fact, it continues to gain steam. I saw a commercial the other day about the new Old Navy yoga pants that are supposed to make your butt look good. A new addition to the world of "do as little as possible but look good doing it." I guarantee that there are several (possibly hundreds or even thousands) of out of shape (often overweight) men and women currently hanging out in front of the television or loading a shopping cart with "health foods" while wearing a pair of those fancy yoga pants bottomed off with a pair of Sketchers Shape-ups, the shoe that promises to tighten your butt while you basically do nothing. Okay, okay, you at least need to walk in those shoes. Seriously, though, I have seen these men and women, the ones who buy into all the hype and fork over the cash because they really think a pair of shoes or a pair of pants will make all the difference. Ours is a culture of instant rewards and instant results, or at the very least a culture of maximum returns for minimal efforts. I don't mean to knock these products. They are fine, and I am sure that they will provide the returns that they claim as long as one puts in the required effort.

News flash! There is no easy fix for obesity, for being out of shape, or for general laziness. Even people who have bariatric surgery face a lot of hard work and a complete lifestyle change. My advice to all those men and women hoping that the right product will do all the work for them? Do it yourself. The right pair of shoes may well be some good old fashioned running shoes.

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